HYPOCRISY & YOUR INNER STRENGTH

HYPOCRISY & YOUR INNER STRENGTH:

When your actions differ from what you showcase to others as ‘your‘ standards or belief systems, this behavior is called Hypocrisy. You must have witnessed people behaving in a very different manner from what they mostly expect from others for themselves, these people are Hypocrites. A Hypocrite is not aware that this trait has been diminishing his inner strength and has been making him weak inside.

Did you ever realize why do people lie?

When you lie, one thing is certain: that you know the truth by yourself. Naturally lying is an attempt to deviate others from knowing the reality.

Reality doesn’t necessarily favor your personal interests all the times. And the fact is that nobody wants his/her personal interests getting hampered due to any good or bad reasons. So they lie, in order to achieve their selfish motives fulfilled. Lying is a device used by people to make others believe in their own version of reality that favors their own interests.

Hypocrisy is a very refined and subtle form of lying.

Hypocrisy is a systematic way of lying by your gestures, behavior and action.

SIGNS OF HYPOCRISY:

Majority of people consciously or unconsciously know what ‘secrets’ of their mind can be revealed to others and what needs to be still kept as secret.

They try hard to hide their weaknesses and showcase only their strengths. Even if sometimes they declare their ‘only‘ weakness to anyone, it sounds like their ‘another strength‘. It is so ingrained in their cunning mind that they can’t remain honest while revealing their weakness.

You must have heard people saying “my only weakness is that I am very emotional and I can’t see others in pain” or “my only weakness is that sometimes I get angry when I don’t see things happening according to my standards”.

By these sort of statements they try to further showcase their strengths. All the so called ‘standards’ and ‘norms’ are made for others not for them.

Sometimes people share their secrets with you to prove their faith in you. But this is just a ploy. While actually revealing those secrets, they modify them. They give you a glorified version of those secrets by fine tuning them according to your interests. They make them more presentable and good looking. Even you would feel that it does not qualify as a secret anymore. The secret elements of those secrets still remain secret.

This behavior is so automatic that most of the people mostly don’t even realize, when did they lie by their gestures and words.

You must have met people who greet you with warmth when they see you. They admire you, give you complements for your attire, accessories, your smile, looks, behavior, character, etc. How many times did you find these gestures real or genuine? The fact is that you know deep inside the hollowness of such appreciation or admiration. You already know that this is all fake and phony.

And on the other side you have your few real friends who carelessly criticize you in front of a group of people, still you won’t mind their criticism at all. You know that they are real and genuine by heart. People who tend to be more realistic, genuine and trustworthy will never criticize you in your absence.

People who mostly admire you on your face are more likely to be fake. It’s very difficult for a hypocrite to admire you in your total absence. Similarly a genuine or straightforward person would never damage your social image in your absence.

Let me tell you an anecdote:

In the old days there used to be a process of writing about the behaviors of the crew members of a ship in their diaries while they were on cruise. Captain would write about his assistants in his diary and assistants would write about the captain in their diaries.

On a cruise there was an assistant named Alex who used to drink alcohol every evening. The captain of the ship used to write it in his diary every day that – “today Alex was drunk again”. This kept on going and Alex somehow came to know that the Captain has been writing what he did every evening.

Now the day came when the ship was about to harbour. Alex requested the Captain not to submit his diary to the authorities at the harbour with those remarks about him but the Captain refused his request.

Now Alex also had to put his remarks in his diary for the captain so he wrote: “Captain was not drunk today”.

Strange are the ways of people when they pretend to be truthful, their gestures are lying.

Psychology of hypocrisy: 

Hypocrisy is a result of a long term conditioning of your mind. Hypocrisy is a way to protect your true face by showing an unreal face. You want to be seen as powerful, kind, caring, concerned helpful and attractive. Who wants to look weak, cruel, selfish, greedy, biased or ugly? You are always concerned about your social image. Your social image is your long term protection plan. Naturally you would try anything and everything to protect it.

If you have closely observed a growing child, you would remember when did he start lying? Children under the age of 4 years hardly ever lie, they are always truthful and they don’t feel any fear while telling you the truth. They don’t know how to pretend. When they cry, its a direct message that they need something. It’s not pretension at all, they cry with their total energy. It’s very transparent behavior.

After this age, child starts learning to pretend and lie to you with his words. He starts learning that every truth is not to be revealed, because some truths bring troubles for him. To avoid those troubles, lying is a best shortcut for him.

After the age of 4 years, a child even starts manipulating the facts and people around him to support him in order to hide the truth which can possibly create troubles for him. With the growing age he starts realizing more and more that though being truthful and trustworthy is regarded as a good character in the society but people occasionally keep lying to safeguard their personal interests and to avoid unwanted hassles.

You as a child had understood in your very early age that this Hypocrisy gives you protection from many troubling situations. Then it starts becoming your habit and you become conditioned to lie more frequently according to the need of the situation. Only words are not sufficient to convince people for a ‘crafted-truth’ so you start using your body language as well to support your words and make them more reliable and authentic.

By and by it becomes part of your personality. You even start feeling yourself proud after fooling people around you. Now even if you want to be truthful someday, your mind doesn’t support you.

Hypocrisy of modern times: 

In the old times, around ten thousand years ago when humans were yet to develop a society, they hardly had anything to hide or keep as a secret in their minds. So they had a straight forward way of interaction with others. They were less hypocritical because it was not needed much. They could speak the truth easily and it hardly created any troubles for them.

In the modern times humans have created so much complexities around – in their social circles, relationships, businesses etc. that truthfulness has become almost extinct. Hypocrisy has become part of human personality and surprisingly it is well accepted by people. You hardly get surprised when you find someone Hypocritical. In fact you are always waiting to see the true colors of a person because deep inside you already know that its bound to happen one day. Hypocrisy has even got different names in the modern times which have got more respect as a trait. Hypocritical people proudly call themselves ‘diplomatic’. Diplomatic behavior is proudly assumed as ‘smart’ way of treating others. People are living multiples lives and they have multiple faces. They are split into multiple personalities.

In great Indian epic of Ramayana the description of the greatest devil of all times is of a man who had ten different faces. He was called Dashanan (Dash means ten and Anan means face or head).

This is a very symbolic and significant expression of truth. You can’t understand a person who has many different faces or split personalities and he can’t be trustworthy at all. He is bound to be deceptive.

Kill the Hypocrisy and Become strong from Within:  

A hypocrite may be feeling happy after fooling others in the short term but it’s long term effects are deadly for his credibility. Sooner or later people come to know the truth and once you are labelled as a hypocrite then the makeover of your image is almost impossible. The famous saying “Honesty is the best policy” is not for others it’s for ourselves.

Find within: if you are hypocrite, you are split and there will be a constant struggle inside between your multiple personalities. When your mind is split into two: one wants to be real and the other want you to keep pretending, it eats-up your individuality. You won’t remain real, even you would not know yourself and would be living in a false reality created by your mind, which actually does not exist. This split or division of your personality only brings weakness of the character for you.

Growth starts when you live totally, when you are one as an individual and there is no struggle inside. Your inner struggle only keeps you restless and makes you weak. Honesty brings the real power and strength. Being honest for yourself makes you realistic and confident. If Hypocrisy is gone, you become one and that’s when you become strong from within.

Wish you all the best ..!!

Grow higher, stay rooted ..

Akhil Mantra

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